Eckhart Tolle has advised many times, that when you have a reaction to something, you look at your reaction. Do nothing but just look. Don’t even resist it. Just look.
Sadhguru the Indian mystic said something about riding on the karmic pattern, or riding on the platform instead of being the platform. That thing that he is riding on is the conditioned reaction–the unconscious emotion and thought.
Jian Xiang Ting the Taiwanese spiritual teacher also said to look at it, do nothing else. The key is to understand. Later I came to understand what this understanding means; in Buddhism it’s called 慧, which is a level of consciousness where you understand how your life came about, how every situation came about. At that point, you won’t be reacting, as reaction is a sign of surprise, as if it is something new or surprising to you.
A Rosen Method therapist also said the same thing, that “there’s nothing to fix. Just notice it.” I didn’t understand why when something unpleasant or undesirable happened, that it’s not something you need to fix.
. . .
I find it hard to just look and do nothing, especially when I have a strong reaction to something, I can’t just look at it, I want to do something to it!
But I try anyways, whenever possible, because that will reverse the situation.
. . .
An example of a situation that I was not able to deal with nor reverse for years, perhaps decades, I managed to do so one day, by looking at it.
I was so incredibly pissed at someone I wanted to explode, but didn’t. My emotion had no way to go except staying repressed. Then a friend chatted with me and told me to give him a piece of my mind.
I didn’t want to launch an attack on him, because that would not improve the situation. Instead, I started to look at my anger. When it subsided a bit, I sent him a message. But every time I engaged in a text conversation with him, I would feel revolted. So I would send one message, look at the arising emotion, wait for it to subside, then send another.
In this incredibly unpleasant exchange, even the process of itself pissed me off. But … I didn’t look at the process. So, my emotional reaction to the process got projected out into our energy circuitry, and he started calling me “immature.”
That made me even more furious!
At that point I had a hard time just looking at my emotion. But I knew how energy works. I had to hold the emotion (not suppress), not let it fly out of my body into the energy circuitry between us, and if it did, I would have to pull it out of the circuitry, otherwise when that energy circulated to him, at the speed of light, and then he bounced it back to me, because he’s 100% unconscious, I would be hit with my own emotion.
So my soul held my anger, almost like holding an atomic bomb from explosion, and I responded to him without the anger. Gradually, I flipped the circuitry.
It took a few back and forths, as each time he replied, it would trigger an imbalanced energy in me, so I would have to identify and release that, while my soul held down my anger, and then projected a neutral or positive energy out to him.
Initially, that circuitry was filled with disconnection, non-acceptance, judgment, etc., where no matter what I said or how I said it, it simply fell inevitably on deaf ears, but not only that, the other person would blame me for being stupid or in this case “immature” which basically meant that it was all my fault, and that’s still not it, that the other person simply would not tolerate my nonsense anymore and wanted to tell me to cut it out, which would be a more polite version as some more aggressive version would be a lot more abusive, and I would be left with a guilt and an abuse for listening but not being heard, for communicating but not being understood, for tolerating but not being tolerated, etc.
I had many similar imbalanced energies relating to disconnection. And when just a handful of them got activated in one incident, I would go ballistic, because this had been such a long-standing energy pattern which over the years collected a lot of intense emotions.
So when my soul helped me hold the emotions such that they didn’t fly out of me, my conscious awareness was registering them at 200% I could almost burst. It was extremely unbearable, but I knew what my objective was–to exit this pattern, to make a U turn.
At one point I could feel that I was about to give up, but I said, “Nobody walks away until this is reversed.” I was talking to his soul. I said to his soul, “Your human has a connection issue too. So stay with me, I will flip this.”
Eventually, he understood my point, he realized his mistake (but didn’t want to swallow his pride so he made up a lame excuse), and he apologized. Every single one of the sentences that he shot at me that I didn’t like, I gave him back and he apologized.
I achieved my goal and walked away from the conversation. But my whole body was trembling, my midsection was burning, and I was gasping for breaths.
. . .
I think spiritual gurus who say to just look at it, don’t really realize what people are grappling with. Yes, in theory, that’s what you need to do to get out of it once and for all, but to actually do it, you can’t just say look at it. That’s like, you want to pass an accounting exam, and someone tells you, just go sit for the exam. I don’t think that advice is practical nor helpful. If someone already knows how to do that, they would not be coming to you for advice in the first place. There is so much more to it than just look at it.
There is a difference between looking at the emotion and ignoring or suppressing it. Looking at it means to perceive it consciously. Experience it 100%, but not become it. When you have an emotional reaction, you become that emotional reaction. Experiencing it is keeping your individuality separate from it.
And you need to experience it, for conscious release. And conscious release is necessary for it to graduate from your existence, from your soul’s memory, so that you won’t have to relive it anymore, in your soul’s reincarnation cycle; meaning, that imbalanced energy will be released from your future and your soul’s future. The conscious mind is the finishing line.
The part about flipping the energy circuitry is an idea that came from Jian Xiang Ting, and pulling out the negative energy from the circuitry is something that my spiritual guidance team taught me.
When I have certain negative thoughts and emotions about someone, they will be projected into the circuitry between me and him, and when the conditions are right, those energies will erupt into a scenario. And when it is happening in the midst of an argument or conversation, I need to be conscious of what I am projecting, and I need to retract the negative energies so that they don’t erupt.
I know the best method is to do nothing and just look, but for me, I missed looking at certain levels because there’s more than one level of energy flying around at one time, and sometimes I wouldn’t know until those overlooked energies bounce back and hit me.
Wanchain's Space 
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